At the beginning of this month I had MRI's of my brain, cervical spine and thoracic spine, mainly because it was just time for my yearly MRI, but also because of some symptoms I've been dealing with for a little while. A couple of days ago I had my follow-up neurology appointment to review the results. The results weren't bad, per se, because they don't show any currently active lesions, but they do show a whole lot of lesions. I've always known I have a fairly significant lesion load, and I've seen them on MRI several times, but it doesn't make it any less upsetting to see them there on the screen each time. Anyway, my neurologist believes that I had a relapse, which is what caused the start of these new symptoms, but that the lesion(s) had settled down by the time I got an MRI. So, steroids won't help me feel better...which is fine with me because I pretty much only want steroids when my vision is affected by a relapse. IV steroids are seriously THE WORST! She upped my nerve pain medication to hopefully alleviate some of the burning pain I've been suffering from in my feet, hands and at the base of my skull, but beyond that, the only "cure" is time. The big news is that because of all of this, my Disease Modifying Therapy is being changed. I currently take Tecfidera, which is an oral treatment, twice a day. I've already been on two injectables and relapsed while in them as well, so the next (last?!) stop is a drug called Tysabri. This drug has been shown in trials to be more than twice as effective than any of the other MS treatments available. It's given by infusion once a month. Why wasn't I already taking this, the most effective drug, you ask? Well, it's effectiveness is amazing, but it has it's downfalls. In fact, not long ago, a friend of mine told me that she was going on Tysabri and my prompt response was "DO NOT DO IT!". Why? Because Tysabri is known to put you at risk for a disease called progressive multifocal leukoencephalopathy (PML). This is basically an incurable brain infection that either ends in severe disability or death, neither of which appeal to me. I thought I'd never agree to take it...but there comes a time in managing Multiple Sclerosis that your treatment options grow even more limited, and I've reached that time. So my options are to continue a treatment that no longer seems to be working for me, stop treatment altogether and let nature takes it's course, or try the scary drug. So, I'm choosing the scary drug. The incidence of PML in patients on Tysabri is 1/1000. Because of this, I will be getting blood work done and having an MRI every 6 months and seeing my neuro every 3 months to be closely monitored. Another scary bit is that I have to do a "wash-out" of the Tecfidera for at least 6 weeks before I can start the new treatment. So Wednesday night, for the first time in YEARS, I did not take my MS medication. I mean, basically right now there is nothing protecting my brain and spine from my immune system, and that freaks.me.out. So, there's that. I'm sure I'll post a lot more about Tysabri when I've had more time to process all of this and research. L
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After we got the final report from the investigative team, we decided to have someone come and cleanse our house. We asked them for a recommendation, which led to me sending an e-mail to a place called Sacred Grounds, ran by a couple named Beth and Barry, on March 18, 2013. Barry is some sort of Native American Shaman and Beth is an empath and a medium (which may mean the same thing...I have no idea).
They came over on Sunday, March 24. We told them everything. Beth played with and talked to Dylan in his playroom and he was surprisingly open with her (which if you know Dylan, you know is not in character for him). He even drew her a picture of the tree that he claimed the entities flew out to from the house. Barry went out and did something around the tree, leaving medicine pouches around it and chanting (neighbors probably wondered what in the hell was going on). He said that the tree was a portal to the other side. We all walked around the house, burning sage and some other herbs while Beth sprinkled holy water, they both prayed and cast out any negative energy. She went especially heavy on the holy water in the downstairs bedroom (Paige's room) and the spare room down there, and had some questions about the use of Ouija board down there, but as far as Dave and I know, nobody used anything like that anywhere in the house. She said that the spare room down there is where the spirits retreat, which is interesting, as it is the room just below the area where Dylan showed me outside of his bedroom that the lady came through the floor. Beth went into Dylan's room alone and shut the door. She was speaking to the lady in there, for quite some time. She told the lady that she had to leave, and even invited her to come home with them, but told her in no uncertain terms that she could not stay here and she could not continue to try to communicate with Dylan in any way. I don't really know everything that she said, but I think that is the gist of it. She sensed James, but said that he kept his distance when they were here, which is not unusual for child entities. She also sensed the other woman, and said that she was Dylan's guardian. Before they left, they told us that we had to stop giving the entities so much attention, because the more energy that we put out, the more active they would become. The following is an excerpt from an e-mail follow-up with Beth: "Your son has a special gift and though it may be hard for you, you will learn that it is a gift. This just is part of who he is. I feel your husband and You are doing an excellent job not encouraging or discouraging his ability yet accepting it. we would be happy as he grows to answer questions as they come up. He will see things others do not. he as he gets older will decide what to do with it. he may reject it or embrace it. There are spirits in many many places in this world. I'm sad if they are stuck here but they have to be willing to go to the light so some times we have to wait until they are ready. My bet would also be that your daughter has some abilities, she is just fearful of them. I was also during my teen years because I didn't understand why they showed themselves to me and not others. I think my fear rose when I started seeing people I knew who had passed. I also think you sense things as well." Beth was actually not the first person through-out this experience who claimed that Dylan was a medium...the bookstore employee mentioned it, as did a friend of a friend who does not know my family. If you've never heard of the "Rainbow Children" and are interested in the idea of kids as mediums, look into it, it's a pretty interesting theory. I e-mailed Beth again on April 3, 2013 asking her if she believed that "The lady" was still around here. She responded on April 6 that his life guide was still here and that was a good thing as she is a protector. She felt that "The Lady" was also still around, but was spending most of her time outside of our house. I have not been in contact with anyone from the paranormal investigative team, nor with the couple who cleansed our house, since that date. Although Dylan did talk about James and The Lady a few times in the days following the cleansing, it was much less than prior and he stopped completely shortly thereafter. If asked about it today, he seems to have no memory of any of it at all. I know I've left a lot out, but these posts are all so long, I tried to hit all of the important parts without writing a novel. The reason I decided to blog about this experience is because Dylan recently told Dave and I (on separate occasions) that he "see's God", and it brought all of this back into the forefront of my mind. But I'll save that post for another day. After the daytime recordings picked up what the investigators considered to be EVP's and evidence of paranormal activity, we scheduled a time for them to come during the night and investigate. Prior to the whole team coming, one of them stopped by and set up some equipment in Dylan's bedroom. That night, though the equipment was not visible to him, for some reason he flat out refused to sleep in his own room. When the investigative team arrived, he was sleeping in my room instead, so they set one piece of equipment up in there as well.
They did not catch any visual evidence of activity in our house, but they did catch several more of what they call EVP's. Following is the final report from the investigators: Case File: Westbriar Residence Clients:Laurie and Dave Courtad When M.A.P.I.T. was contacted about this case, we wanted to make our response quick. Anytime a child is involved in suspected paranormal activity it is considered a high priority case. When we work on cases involving children we want to make minimal impact so as not to disrupt the child's routine. To facilitate this we suggested setting up a voice recorder and a mini dv recorder for a day to quietly check out the room that was the main reported location of activity. Dylan had made comments that led us to believe we were dealing with two possible spirits. The first he called James who was a little bot and the second he just called the lady. Day Drop Equipment
The digital recorder proved most useful in this case. It gave us the resounding answer that there was some activity in the home. The camera was set up in the closet to try and take in as much of the Dylan's playroom as possible. The voice recorder was set up on camera, in the crevice of the window jam, where we were hoping that the three year old wouldn't notice it. Dylan did seem to be reluctant to play in the room on his own while the equipment was running. Yet, nonetheless we did receive several clips that were unprompted by anyone. After Myst did the initial set up it only took about 18 minutes to catch the first anomaly on the recorder. Many of the audio clips captured come across as whispers that we have found are the most common type ofEVP (electronic Voice Phenomena) that is typically captured. This also goes in line with Dylan's assertion that the Lady talks small or little (ie: a whisper). Attached are the clips listed below (3 emails to cover the large file sizes). 18mins8seconds, the first clip is the t.v. in the background, and Dylan playing, but there is a quiet whisper within the clip. 21m25s Dylan is talking to himself, yet it sounds like something may respond to him. 44m16s Dylan is playing, but with mom not in the room. There sounds like someone else. 54m30s You can hear the t.v., and both Laurie and Dylan. There is a whisper within that doesn't sound like either. 56m45s A strange conversation between Dylan and Laurie, about is the girl mean. Who is he talking about? Is he talking about Myst? Or someone else? 1h212m15s Dylan and the t.v., but the whispering voice he seems to respond to isn't Laurie, or the same as the t.v. program. 1h31m10s Laurie is talking on the phone in the kitchen/living room area. 1h50m36s Laurie and Dylan are looking for something in the playroom. There is a female whisper. The recorder then resets and there is a second file, and the times start back at 0 46m8s titled is it blue, Laurie and Dylan again are talking, yet there is a voice again that doesn't fit. 46m31s Laurie asks Dylan some questions, but Dylan doesn't seem to be the only response. 1h6m8s Still wondering if this isn't Dylan, but this is a whisper. 1h8m6s Laurie asks if Dylan can say something, and he says hello, but as hes talking there is another whisper. the last clip from the day run unfortunately didn't get a time stamp, but Laurie asks what this hair is, and while Dylan is clearly talking, so is something else. Having collected enough data we opted to do a night investigation. We were curious as to if the activity would persist after Dylan was sleeping. Dylan again seemed reluctant to be on camera and did not sleep in his room. While the activity did seem to calm down after Dylan was asleep we did catch some audio clips. Myst's Personal Audio: 36m40s We had just asked if Laurie had spoken upstairs while Dan, Gail, and Myst were in the basement, and there was a faint whisper again. 51m29s This clip is just saved, for the fact that i have never heard this type of glitch on the voice recorder before. 1h52m41s Myst is letting the spirits know why we are there. Myst, Gail, and Laurie are all in the room together. 1h54m25s Gail asks if they can tell us their name, there is a breathy sound that almost sounds like a reply. Dylan's Play Room Audio: 1A-16.21 Breath that Roger and Dave Heard. 1B - this is the 16.21 sound highlighted 2A 37.05 This whispering almost sounds like singing. 2b is the 37.05 highlighted (personal note: when I listen to this part I hear a familiar name here, what do you think? - Daniel) To Be Continued..... Following are the first 5 EVP's sent to me my the paranormal investigators. It's best if you listen to them in a quiet room, volume up, with headphones on.
Audio 1: View My Video In this one, I am speaking to someone on the phone, Dylan is napping, and the TV is on in the background. Audio 2: View My Video This is a shortened version of Audio 1, focused on unusual breathy sound. Audio 3: View My Video Another when I'm still on the phone and Dylan is still napping. Audio 4: View My Video Dylan and I are talking, TV is on in the background Audio 5: View My Video Shortened version of Audio 4, focused on unusual breathy sound The following is a copy & paste of something I wrote on February 24, 2013. It includes more detail than Part I on here, as it was all fresh in my mind: Almost since he's been able to speak Dylan has been seeing and talking about a little boy named James. For about a year he's also been seeing and talking about someone that he calls "the lady". His stories about them have never once changed and I do not believe that it's his imagination, I believe that he is truly seeing these things. Sometimes he is afraid of them, but he's gotten less so more recently. I tell him that they don't want to scare him, they just want to be his friend...because really, I have no idea what else to say. He'll come running out from his play room or bedroom (usually at least once a day) yelling at me to pick him up and save him from "the lady". Last week I told him that if he saw her again to ask her what her name is. Thursday he started running out of his play room and then stopped and turned around yelling "Wait! What your name is? What your name is?" He also told me last week that the lady came and took him from his bed because she wanted to lay with him. He said she came up "through the floor" right outside of his bedroom door, and took him down back through the floor to sleep with her in her bed. I asked him if he meant down into the basement, but he said no, just through the floor to where she lives. He said that he didn't want to go and was scared but that she picked him up (even showing me how he struggled and imitating how she carried him) and made him. Then a couple of nights later he woke up at 2:00 a.m. and said the lady was sleeping in his bed with him and he didn't want her there and wanted to come and sleep in our bed with us. He says the lady (and James, although nowadays it seems to be all about the lady) doesn't have any eyes and he shows me how it looks by pulling his cheeks down right under his eyes, doesn't have feet or toes, can fly, can go through walls and the floor and she can't talk very well. He asks me why she talks "so little" and when I asked how she talked he whispered hoarsely and said "She talk like this. So little, hard to hear." He says that they are mean and scary. I continue to tell him that they just want to be his friend and play with him, that they don't mean to scare him (although James growls at him, apparently and does try to scare him) and that they can't hurt him. At the time of writing the above description, I'd just e-mailed a local Paranormal Investigative Team that I found through Google. By this point I'd also spent hours combing through old records at the college library, looking at death records for the general area and researching paranormal activity. When I don't understand something, my first inclination is always to try to learn as much about it as I can. This was tough in this situation, for many reasons, but mostly because I absolutely 100% did not believe in ghosts, spirits, angels, demons, the afterlife....whatever you call it, I was not buying it, so this whole experience really rocked me to the core. I visited a local new age bookstore, hoping to find a reliable literary source on the topic and to buy some Sage, thinking it couldn't hurt to burn it around the house as so many had suggested. I was almost immediately approached by an employee offering assistance, but I didn't even know how to put all of this into coherent words, so I just stuttered out something about needing some sage. The store phone rang, and the employee excused herself, but kind of handed me over to another employee, before going to answer the phone. The second woman asked me to sit down on the couch in a small sitting area they had and she sat down across from me and....I guess...gave me a reading of sorts?!? It was very unexpected and somewhat alarming. She KNEW why I was there. She told me that The Lady was James' mother, and that they'd died in an accident. The Lady had left behind another son, who was now a grown man and still alive, but that she was confused and thought that Dylan was her other son, so that's why she was trying to take him with her. She also told me that there was another female spirit in my home, but that she did not interact with Dylan at all, that she was just was here because she wanted him to be okay. She said that The Lady was confused and frightened and that I needed to encourage her to go into the light, that her family was waiting there for her, and that she would understand everything after she went into the light. She said I may have to ask her family on the other side to come down and bring her into the light. Uh...no. I have enough trouble without inviting more of them to come on down, thankyouverymuch! It was INSANE. To this day, I still can't believe what happened in that store. Meanwhile, I heard back from the paranormal activity team and they were excited to come and see what was going on and help us out with our situation. The first thing that they did was come in and set up a recording device in the windowsill in Dylan's playroom and a video camera in the playroom closet, as the playroom in the day time seemed to be the focus of much of the strange activity. It recorded for 8 hours and then they came and picked it up to analyze. It didn't take long for them to get back to me with a resounding "YES! There is audio evidence of paranormal activity," as the first EVP can be heard only 18 minutes after the recording started. To Be Continued.... Almost as soon as my 5-year old son was able to communicate with us effectively (when he was about 2-years old), he began telling us about a woman and a little boy that hung around in his playroom and bedroom. He referred to the woman as "The Lady" and to the little boy as "James". * He spoke of one or the other, or both, almost daily in the year leading up to him turning 3-years old. As a parent, I believe that it's important to really listen to your children and not just shrug things off, or worse, tell them that what they are saying is not the truth just because it sounds fantastical to you. So in that vein, I listened to whatever he had to say about The Lady and James, while occasionally asking clarifying questions.
Did I think it was weird? Heck yeah! I don't even believe in that sort of thing, but I do believe in my son. Not to mention that, at that age, there really just isn't any way for him to be making that kind of stuff up, you know? He asked me why they "talk so little", that one took me a minute to figure out, but then he whispered quietly, saying "They talk like this". He said that they didn't have any feet or eyeballs and told me that they flew out to the tree in our front yard, the one that could be seen from his bedroom window. Whatever he was communicating with and seeing seemed relatively harmless, and he did not appear to be frightened in any way, so I just kept listening to what he had to say and conversing with him like this was all totally normal. Some times he'd come running out of his playroom and say that The Lady was in there again. Once I asked him to ask her his name, so he ran back in and said "Hey! What's you name? What's you name??" but came back out saying that she hadn't answered. Shortly after that, he DID start showing some signs of fear in relation to The Lady and James. He said that he didn't want her in his bedroom at night anymore. I asked what she was in there for and he replied that she wanted to sleep with him and snuggle him, but sometimes she wanted to take him "through the floor with her". I thought he meant down to our lower level, and asked if he meant down by his sister's room, but he said "No. Through the floor, down where The Lady lives", and proceeded to show me a spot in the hallway outside of his room that he said The Lady came and went from. He told me that she kept trying to lift him up and telling him to come with her and he showed me, by pulling at my shirt sleeves, how she was trying to lift him. I know how crazy this all sounds, but you have to remember that I'm talking about a 3-year old, who has no frame of reference for fabricating a tale like this. To Be Continued..... *I just looked back at some information regarding this, so wanted to add that in August 2012 is when he first began talking about James. The lady didn't come until later. And he was originally afraid of James and referred to him as a "monster," and James flew out to the tree as of October 2012, which means Dylan was 2.5 years old when this started. A common affliction of people who have Multiple Sclerosis is something called Lhermitte's Sign. It's a sudden electrical shock sensation that passes down the back of your neck and into your spine. It may also radiate down through your arms and legs. It's generally triggered by bending your head forward towards your chest (basically, bending your neck to look down). I've experienced this several times, and have submitted myself to steroid treatment for it once.
For the last several months I have had a constant burning pain in the base of my skull that eventually makes me feel like the back of my head is going to explode. Every.single.day. it gives me headaches. A lesion has been noted between C1-C2 of my cervical spine for a few years now and my neurologist wondered if this pain could be related to that lesion. I had MRI's of my brain, cervical spine and thoracic spine a week ago today (THREE HOURS of lying in the MRI machine). Though I haven't spoken to my doctor regarding the results yet, they are available on the patient portal, so I've read the radiologists notes on the test. The lesion is still there, but is not what they consider "active" (meaning it didn't light up with contrast). But really, I feel like just the fact that there is a lesion (or scar or whatev) there could be the culprit, active or not, ya know? I have no idea what can be done for it, though. It's so surreal to read or hear people referring to lesions in my brain or spine like they don't mean anything. Multi-focal white matter lesions, meaning MANY lesions, result in a diagnosis of "stable" test results. Well, great. There are MANY lesions inside my brain, but all is good. I wonder how they would feel if it was THEIR brain being described? How "stable" would they feel? On another note, the MRI of my thoracic spine shows "multi-level disk desiccation with end plate degenerative change" and "uncovertebral arthropathy at C3-C4 and C5-C6". Maybe this explains my constant back pain? My neurologist didn't mention anything about it in her notes because it's not her gig, so I'll have to follow up somewhere else on that I guess. |